I think there is no way of catching up. Once behind, always behind no matter what. I think I might have learned this the hard way. There is no more examination or testing like I said I was going to do. Only failed ideals. I can't even strip away everything and glue it back together. I don't know what will happen next. The future looks grim and warm at the same time. Uncertainty is among everyone and myself included. It looks like I may have to do an alternate thing that could help or destroy me.
I will see how things play out in the near future and will report back.