Saturday, November 20, 2010

Sudden Death Pt.1

I would have to say it all happened to fast for me to comprehend. I was having discussions with two prominent figures and suddenly, with a lift of a finger, I accepted a lifetime of torture and death taking some kind of after school program. This is most unfortunate news as I have to cancel all my evening plans to get it to my school event. This is just a horrific event for anyone to grasp I guess. This after school supposedly is going to help my academic scores. I am just going to point out now that money does not fix everything. While my results were going positive, I did not have enough concrete evidence to back up my claim that I had everything under control. With no trust or respect towards any of my decisions I am going to have to destroy a lot of things that I built up over the past months and tear them to the ground.

Now I do agree that I should go to the after school, this is a bad time as I finally figured out why I was doing so poorly in classes. I was constantly adjusting and adapting new ideas and concepts until the correct one comes to place. I believe that this after school thing might either rush this process or just put me behind from my real goals. Now I am getting to a depressed state after I built myself up and it just is not any good. My methods and ideas just need time to mature and I did not get enough time, for some reason everybody said that there is never enough time but I would like to say even if I am the first to say that time is plentiful. Things are changing rapidly and I don't think I can swim against the currents that are washing me down. I guess I have to do what everybody has been saying... "Go With The Flow."

I think this is "BullShit!" I don't think after school is anything but a waste of time for me as of now. It might help me now but in the future, I will have to go through everything I have been going through AGAIN. This after school is only a temporary effect. I have made a plan that can make this after school a benefit for me however and all I have to do is think about it....

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