A New Hope

A new time and era is coming for me and this is actually something that can be very exciting. But, I have to be very careful because one wrong step can kill me. I have to be strong by fighting the evil spirits inside me; and not only that, but I have to evaluate each individual to make sure they are okay. These are going to be strange times for me because I have been away from that environment for such a long time. I am not sure how I am going to fit in, especially when I am already depressed.

The things I am doing will determine my future. Everything depends if I enjoy it or not and if I don't, then I am in big trouble. It means my core ideas have been flawed from the start and I will probably have to start over. Since I am very late in my studies, that would not be a good thing so I will have to try my hardest to survive. There will probably be plenty of distractions, but I will have to fight them off to make sure everything is okay.

It's a new hope for me and probably the last chance I will get for a while.

Always will be behind

I think there is no way of catching up. Once behind, always behind no matter what. I think I might have learned this the hard way. There is no more examination or testing like I said I was going to do. Only failed ideals. I can't even strip away everything and glue it back together. I don't know what will happen next. The future looks grim and warm at the same time. Uncertainty is among everyone and myself included. It looks like I may have to do an alternate thing that could help or destroy me.

I will see how things play out in the near future and will report back.