The Final Cut

It's that time of year again where nostalgic feelings about a special someone are felt. There is a never-ending wave of negativity in the air that leave you depressed as "fuck." So is it really the time to move on?

There is only one answer to this question and it is YES.

This is the answer because if you do not move on, you will end up in a infinite Circle of Problems. When this happens, everything becomes a little darker inside and life becomes a sad story. Since this cannot be, we must end the chapter and write a happier one. But to end a chapter, you must forget about everything that makes you remember. However, it seems like every time I try, I fuck up. The only way to end is with time. It sucks, but it is the way it works. So you better forget it quickly or else...

So I raise a glass of whiskey for all you gents who are willing end this chapter with me and write a happier one.

"To success and victory for all."

The World Is Mine

I think it's time for me to stop fucking around. Things are getting too far out of hand and I need to fix it. I have become too attached to someone and now it's time to cut off all ties. I now realize how dangerous of a road I have taken and will not do it again. My mental state is weak and not stable. My head is spinning out of control and the time I am sleeping is not helping.

I need to get the fuck out before it's too late. The world is my oyster and it's fucking time I treat it like it.

More Angry

As the days of happiness passes, I grow more angry. I don't know why, but all this anger is just consuming me and just turning me into a bad person. I don't want to be angry anymore, because I just want to turn that anger into production. I just can't fuck around anymore. I really need to change or else I will be in a path of failure.

I need to start thinking more positively. I need to change my ways. I am just too lost to do all that right now. I almost have nothing to lose.

Fuck This Day

I have failed to follow my own advice and basically destroyed myself. This advice which I told myself to always have in mind has not really failed me but today was the day I had luck on my side. Today overall is a horrible day for me because it just is. I still have a chance to make it up for whats left of it. I just hate myself now because of the mistake I made. I am not sure how much more failures will come towards my way because I have not learned from my mistakes.

Yesterday was not a good day, even on the special occasion.  My freedoms have been stripped from me and I am constantly tired. The day of the big exam has also failed me dearly causing me to lose my path to a career and job. Why do everything have to be emphasized in test scores and results? That is a question that I want to know. I am sitting here today finding out the worst possibility scenario for myself. I dug myself a hole which I will never dig myself out of.

I hope anyone reading this will take my advice and move past me so here you go...

If you have to go somewhere but did not prepare for what you have to do, just go anyways. Luck is usually on your side and you just lose the cost of one thing to gain many others.  Sorry for my grammar errors on everything, but I am extremely angry and lonely in this world.